The truth is, I’m a mess. The truth is, I can’t concentrate on anything. I try to write/work and just end up staring at my screen, maybe clicking around online but mostly staring. I know this behavior needs to stop. I’m aware that I’m digging myself into a hole from which it may take a dag gum bulldozer to get me out of. But I can’t shake it. Yes, I have some personal things going on – but nothing that deserves all of this nonsense. No one is sick, no one is dying…I’m screaming at myself to stop feeling this way but I’m not listening, which shouldn’t be too much of a shocker, since I never listen. But I wish I would listen, just this once.

I feel like folks don’t even want to be around me. I wouldn’t want to be around me. I’m like a broken record playing this horribly sad and depressing song over and over. SOMEONE MOVE THE LITTLE THINGY WITH THE NEEDLE! PLEASE! I don’t want to be this way. I want to be happy. Hey, I have a book out in print – so what if no one knows? It’s still there! Hey, my kid was invited to attend an amazing school – so what if he wants to chuck it all and be a cartoonist? At least he was invited. Hey, my husband didn’t leave me – so what if he thinks it’s one of the biggest mistakes he ever made not to? He’s still here. Hey…oh, just never mind.

Seems there are a lot of typos in Playing With Fire…which is just perfect. My wonderfully honest friend read the book and made a list. She’s going to email the publisher for me. She makes me happy. I guess the good thing about POD is perhaps they can change the file they give to the printer. Then there will be no typos and that would actually be perfect. Though, let’s be real here, when has Christy ever been synonymous with perfection? Never. Ughhh…SEE WHAT I MEAN? This blog is depressing. I hope you didn’t even make it this far. Here’s a cute kitty from Pinterest via imgfave.com, just in case you did.

Cute Kitten

Tomorrow will be better.